I can’t believe we’re a third though November, and NaNo already. Where does the time go?
As you may remember from previous posts, I’ve not been doing too well. I’ve been behind since the beginning. I’ve had a couple of days this week where I’ve written more than the obligatory 1,667 words (2063 on Sunday, 1771 on Monday and 1828 on Tuesday), so I’m happy with them, but then the end of the week, and the weekend have been bad. Last week I said I wanted to catch up b today. Oops.
I had a friend’s hen party this weekend. I got the train up to the town we were meeting in on Friday (which happens to be where I’m from and where my parents live). The journey was a couple of hours, and I got 1,126 words written, by hand, during the journey. The rest of the weekend was spent on hen stuff.
The train home today had a socket by my seat (I got a dirt cheap first class ticket!) so I got some computer written words done. Unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling too well (hen party hangover), an the train was quite bumpy, so it was only 273. Still, that’s 273 more than I had.
I also managed to do some more plotting, which I’m really happy with. I don’t know what my next scene will be, but I’ve had a couple more ideas for later in the novel. Really happy with this. My major problem is that I don’t have names for some of the characters – including the main two characters. It’s from one of their POVs, so less important, but her name is still used by other people. The other MC hasn’t come in yet, but will be soon, so I need to find that, and soon. In fact, maybe I’ll look for a name tonight. Or maybe I’ll write the other half of my 1,667 words for today. Oh dear, just seen the time. I really need an early night today, so maybe I’ll do it all tomorrow!
As I did last week, I’m going to post some writing. I liked the idea of posting what I’d written that day, so here is what I wrote today (again, please ignore the bad spelling, punctuation etc, in true NaNo style, I’ve not edited – that’s what December’s for, right!):
‘I just don’t understand why you’re not believing them and making this harder than you have to. Yes, it’s terrible she’s gone, but I’m sure she had her reasons. Denial about it isn’t going to bring her back. The police have records saying she was arrested for prostitution, things like that don’t just appear. They’re in the system. I’m sorry honey, but it’s all true. The sooner you accept that the better.’
I stopped chopping the vegetables, put down my knife and turned to him. He was leaning on the kitchen table.
‘How can you believe it? You’re a sensible man, and Amy is a sensible woman, she wouldn’t leave Shannon, and she wouldn’t go without telling me.’ I walked past him to get the meat out the fridge.
‘But she has.’
‘No. I’m sorry David, but I don’t believe that. I can’t and I won’t. She’s my sister for gods sake. I’m going to do what I can to find her. I’m going to look under every stone, upturn anything until I find her and find out what’s happened to her.’
I turned away from him to walk back to my chopping board, but David grabbed my free arm.
‘What are you going to do?’ he asked. He had a strange look on his face, I wasn’t sure what it was, but it was unpleasant. I had never been scared of him before, and wasn’t then, but I was close to it. ‘Don’t do anything that-’
‘That what David?’ I almost spat at him. Then I realised what he was thinking. ‘Oh, I get it: don’t do anything that will embarrass you. That’s what you mean isn’t it? My sister’s missing and all you care about is your career.’ I tried to shake his hand off my arm, but he was gripping too tightly. That fear I wasn’t feeling was getting closer.
‘NO,’ he shouted in retaliation to my rising voice. ‘We know what happened, so I don’t want you digging into things that don’t need digging into. The police have told you the truth. Just leave it at that. I do not want or need, and neither do you, your name in the papers dragging stuff up and making both yourself and me look stupid.
‘Just get a grip, and believe what the police are telling you. They’re the police. Jeez X.’ He let go of my arm, almost flinging it towards my body, and stormed out the room. I stumbled, probably more in shock than anything else, but kept my balance. A few seconds later I heard the front door slam.
I looked at my arm, there were red marks where his fingers had dug into me. I couldn’t believe that just happened. David and I rowed sometimes, but he’d never laid a finger on me in anger. He just wasn’t like that.
Obviously it showed how much his job meant to him. More than my sister. Some marriage we had.
I turned round to carry on making some food when I heard Shannon behind me at the door. Shit, I’d forgotten she was in the house while we were arguing, but we hadn’t been too loud so I didn’t really think about it.
‘Hey Shannon, are you nearly ready for dinner? It will be ready in a minute.’ I turned back to the dinner, but she didn’t answer me. I looked back at her and realised she looked quite so white.
‘Shannon, are you ok.’ She didn’t say anything, so I walked over to where she was and crouched down. I touched her forehead, she seemed ok. ‘Are you not feeling well.’ She shook her head. ‘What’s wrong.’
‘Are you and Uncle David arguing?’ For a second I was taken aback. We really hadn’t been that loud, yes he’d shouted at me, but the lounge was the other side of the house.
‘Come here.’ I sat on a chair in the kitchen, and pulled her onto my lap. I stroked her hair. ‘Sometimes couples argue, it’s just an adult thing. But we’re ok. Did you hear us?’ She nodded. ‘I’m sorry Shannon. But we’re ok.’
‘Is Uncle David going to hit you? Are we going to leave him?’ She burst into tears. Of course, Amy and her father used to argue like hell, then he hit Amy. A few times apparently Shannon had seen.
‘No Shannon. No. We’re fine.’ I tried to push the memory of David’s hand on my arm, and the red marks he left from my mind. ‘David is not your father. He’s a good man. He wouldn’t hit me, and we’re definitely not going to split up.’ I squeezed her tightly, but she didn’t stop crying. I could have murdered David for starting this, and making her more upset. I knew though, that if he’d known she’d been listening, he wouldn’t have done anything. He really loved her, and wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.
That was one positive thing.
‘Look Shannon, your father was a bad man. When your Mummy found out she left him. Unfortunately she had to do things before she could leave him, which is why you sometimes saw things. David is a good man, he’s not going to do anything wrong. He’s not going to hit me. I promise. Do you believe me?’
She pulled away and looked at me earnestly, with tears falling down her face. It broke my heart to see her that upset about something I’d done, that we could have avoided. After everything she’d been through over the last week or so, we should be protecting her, not making her feel on edge again.
She nodded. Phew. I wiped away the tear marks from her face. Another tear fell from her right eye.
‘I miss Mummy.’ I pulled her back to my body and rocked her back and forth while she burst into another round of tears.
‘Me too Shannon, me too.’ I knew I had to find Amy, or at least find out what happened, not just for her, or me, but for her little girl.