Tag Archive | fear

New week new post

I see a pattern emerging here in my blogging.  Writing at the beginning of the week, then nothing towards the end or over the weekend.

You will however be pleased to hear (I am at least) I’ve finally finished the first assignment for my course.  I just need to proof read it and send it in.  I’m feeling quite nervous about it – I’ve not had anything marked for years.  This will also be the 1st step towards me finding out if I can really write or not.  Although they say anyone can become a writer, there must be people out there that really can’t – no matter how much tuition they are given..  Realistically I know I’m not one of those people (mainly attributed to school grades given to creative writing, but also to people commenting and reading my blog – thanks again!), but I think I would not be human to have slight underlying fears about this. 

The exciting thing about this is that I now get to move on to assignment two.  I’ve not read anything about it yet, so am very excited.  The first parts I think are all none fiction which is quite scary as this is not the genre I want to write but more of a challenge too.  The course has a money back guarantee that you will make back your the course fees in selling writing before you finish it.  That’s an exciting (and terrifying) thought – hopefully I’ll be SELLING my writing.  People will be paying to read what I write.  Wow!

The other exciting thing about finishing is that I now get my ‘reward’ to myself – the new Marion Keyes book.  This means my life will now stop for a few days while I read it.  She never disappoints.  Just need to find some time to start reading it!

You may notice an addition to my blog homepage (if that’s what it is?).   A second page – ‘What I’m reading’.  As I’ve said on it, I want to keep track of the books I read so here it is. I’d like to also give recommendations to others to read the books I enjoy.  The only problem is I don’t seem to be able to add tags to the page.  I need more help.  Please.

I went to the Museum of London last week.  I quickly decided that it wasn’t the place to write about.  I find it hard enough to convey how much I really enjoy something – I’m not sure I could start to consider how to convey not enjoying things.  It wasn’t that bad, but it wasn’t the Science Museum (I’m already looking forward to going back there).  It was just a little boring.  It felt slightly like a history lesson with very little interaction and fun.  Still, I felt cultured afterwards.  I’m going to try to visit a museum every month.  See if I can do all the tourist things now I live in London!  I’ll also continually feel cultured. 

On that note I’m going to see the Album Chart show being filmed tonight.  Ha ha!

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Too many choices

I found out this weekend that more people read my blog than just my other half. This really excites me, but also really scares me. People are reading what I write. This is the thing that scares me about writing – other people reading it. This is the reason that only the man and my Mum know about my blog. This could create a little problem when trying to sell writing and novels. How can I be scared of my biggest ambition? I do worry myself sometimes. (Thanks to the people who are reading this – hopefully over time I will conquer this fear!).

I’ve now done 2 different versions of assignment one. Over the weekend I went clubbing to Pacha (Hed Kandi – woo hoo!) and for the whole night I couldn’t get the thought out of my head about what I would write if I was reviewing the night (the assignment is to review a place I visit that interests me). I wasn’t sure if reviewing a club would be appropriate for a writing course, but then realised that people do review club nights in magazines, so why not give it a shot? So yesterday I wrote assignment 1 – mark 2. This time I managed it in the right number of words (just – only by cutting out the last sentence).

Now I need to decide which version I should send as my assignment. Decisions decisions. I’m going to read through them both tonight (maybe re write the Science Museum one to cut down the words – maybe go through cutting out words) and see. My problem will come if I read them both and like them both. I have never been good at making decisions on things like this (I can’t think when I would have been in the position to make that kind of decision before). If something’s good I want to use it. Lets just hope one of them isn’t good.

My other problem (I swear I just make them up for myself) is knowing whether to ask other people’s opinions on the articles to see which they think I should send in (or what they think of them). I really think I should make the decision myself as the course is all about me so I should be deciding. But I want opinions. But then if I get opinions I might change things to go with their opinions, which might make the course pointless as they are giving me judgement and help on my writing, not someone else’s.